Catching up...

Well, it has been quite a while since I've posted. My blog has been so very neglected recently. I will try to catch up on all of the events and pictures I have missed in the last month.

Butch's Birthday
On April 16th we went down to Peachtree City to celebrate Butch's birthday. We started out the morning by watching Trip's Tball game. It was so adorable to watch him play ball--and he was great at it too! Nicholas of course loved it and wanted to join in the game but enjoyed playing catch with Daddy and Grandad instead. Afterwards we went back to Aunt Lauren's house for pizza, cake and presents. It was a very special birthday celebration for a very special man. After such a difficult year, it was such a joyous occasion to celebrate Grandad's birthday.

Nolan's Baptism
On April 25th, Nolan was baptized at church. It was a wonderful day and celebration! It was amazing the difference between the baptisms of our two boys. First for Nicholas, he screamed throughout the entire time he was in the sanctuary. Then as we stepped up to the front of the altar, he broke my beautiful blue beaded necklace and beads flew everywhere. While my family was on their hands and knees picking up beads, I stood there panicking with a screaming baby. Then when Pastor Steve held him up and told him he was a beautiful child of God, Nicholas puked all over him! As soon as I had Nicholas back in my arms I ran out of the sanctuary! I was out the door while Pastor Steve was still talking about Nicholas!
Nolan's experience couldn't have been more different. He was an absolute angel. He sat peacefully in my arms and Aunt Ashley's arms during worship beforehand and enjoyed the music. He never cried once and Pastor Steve even held him up and gave him a chance to follow in his big brother's footsteps and puke on him, but he never did. He then lasted the entire rest of the service, even during the sermon, without making a peep!! Nicholas has never done that in his life and yet we are able to bring Nolan into church with us every week. What a difference two brothers can be! After the church service we all went back to Mom and Dad's house for a lunch and it was wonderful! The food was delicious and it was wonderful to have all of the family and special friends there to celebrate God's gift of our precious baby. He even did great during the party too! He received some very special gifts as well. It was a blessed day!

Mother's Day
This was an incredible mother's day thanks so much to my wonderful husband. On Friday, Graham took me out for a surprise Mother's Day date. He planned everything and I had no clue what we were doing! He took me to the Forum and we had reservations at Grace 17:20, an amazingly delicious restaurant. It was such a nice evening and we sat outside, enjoyed terrific food, wine, music, and each other's company. It's amazing how having an uninterrupted conversation is such a luxury these days! After dinner Graham handed me some cash and told me to go on a shopping spree!!! I couldn't believe it! I spent my entire spree in one store and bought 2 dresses, a necklace and earrings. It was SO nice to try on clothes and actually buy something for me! Afterwards we came home and watched Avatar. On Sunday, I got some really sweet cards from the boys and opened Nick's gift that he made at school--a precious flower pot decorated by him with seeds to plant in it. We went to church and Sunday School and then over to Mom and Dad's house for lunch and to celebrate Mimi. What an amazing mom I have! I'm so thankful for her everyday! I am also so blessed with Kathy as my mother-in-law. I couldn't have it better. Two amazing moms to learn from and strive to be like!

A day in the life of Mommy

12:02 am. Reading proofs and I can't keep my eyes open anymore. Decide to go to sleep and set alarm for 6:00 am. to finish proofing before Graham leaves for work.
3:55 am. Wake to Nolan crying. Reswaddle him, check for diaper leaks, give him his pacifier and stumble back to bed.
4:25 am. Nolan crying again. Go in and calm him again and head back to bed.
6:45 am. Wake to Nicholas over the monitor "Mommyanddaaaaddddddyyyyy". Wonder how I managed to not hear the 6:00am alarm. Go get Nick up, put him on the potty, then head for the kitchen to make his cup and breakfast.
6:55 am. Realize I am leaking milk all over my t-shirt and I am not wearing breat pads.
7:00 am. Pump 8 ounces!! My most ever!
7:25 am. Nolan wakes up, nurse. Give him his vitamin, reflux meds, and constipation meds. Grab a cup of coffee and quick bagel.
7:45 am. Ask Nicholas multiple times if he has to go potty. He adamently says no. Nicholas stays in the living room while I bring Nolan into the bathroom with me (in the infant seat) while I shower.
7:55 am. I'm enjoying a wonderful, hot shower with shampoo in my hair and soap all over when I hear Nick run into the bathroom saying, "I need to go potty Mommy! I'm ready now Mommy! Oh, Mommy, I'm going potty now Mommy!" Covered in suds I run out of the shower and put him on the potty (despite his protests of going on the big potty rather than the small potty that is out in the living room).
8:00 am. I quickly finish with my shower as Nolan has now begun to get fussy. Fussiness quickly escalates to hysterical screaming as if in pain. Worry that he is in pain due to constipation (he is on meds due to not going for 2 whole weeks and now it's been 3 days without while on meds). Give him a supository (fun!) He continues screaming and nothing is consoling him. Walk laps around the house with him in my arms while he cries until he suddenly falls asleep (way before naptime) and I put him in his crib.
8:45 am. Break up a "fight" between Nicholas and Baxter over their spots on the couch.
9:00 am. Spill my powdered blush all over myself and the carpet. Vacuum up makeup.
9:30 am. Nicholas has to potty again but is too late. Put him on the potty. Finish getting myself and Nicholas dressed and ready, bags packed.
9:45 am. Wrap birthday gifts--realize I have no birthday wrapping paper and reuse some gift bags.
10:00 am. Wake Nolan, get him dressed and packed up and boys loaded into the car for the 40 minute drive to Kennedy and Maddie's birthday party that started at
9:30 am. Half way thru the drive it occurs to me that I forgot to put on breast pads and any moment my breasts will let down and leak all thru the only shirt I have. If I wait to get to Courtney's house, I'm pretty sure I'll arrive with 2 large wet circles on my chest. I find a CVS and stop to buy pads, dragging a whining Nicholas and thankfully a quiet Nolan in to the store. By some miracle, I manage to get the pads without incident. (Five minutes later, I feel the let down.) We arrive at the party 1 hour and 30 minutes late!
11:00 am. During the party, I must put Nick in time out 3 times for various tantrums. At one point he starts crying and says he is sick and his tummy hurts. He turns pale as a ghost and we rush to the bathroom thinking he's going to throw up. Thankfully nothing happens though and in a little while he is back to playing.
12:30 pm. Head to Chick-fil-a with Courtney, Kennedy, and Maddie. Things go surprisingly well despite Nolan not sleeping and being a little fussy. Spill lemonade all over diaper bag as I'm getting back in the car. Worry some more that Nolan has not gone to the bathroom despite supository given at 8:30 am. Call doctor.
2:30 pm. Arrive home, put Nick to bed, nurse Nolan. Receive call from Doctor saying I need to take Nolan for x-ray to see if he has a blockage in his colon. Call Mom to have her come over and stay with Nick while he sleeps.
4:00 pm. Arrive at Children's for x-ray. Pray. Wait in waiting room for 1 hour. Hold a screaming Nolan still for x-rays. Pray.
6:00 pm. Get good news from doctor that the x-ray was normal. Make dinner for family. Deal with Nick's 3 poopy accidents in his pants (or rather, watch as Graham deals with it as I hold Nolan).
7:30 pm. Get both boys in bed and breathe a sigh of relief.
8:30 pm. Go to grocery store. Eat ice cream :)
10:00 pm. Update blog, pump, and hopefully go to bed soon for it to all start again...
Sometimes you just have to laugh (and pray) through the crazy joys of motherhood!

Potty training pro

Just want to update on my pottying pro! Nicholas is doing awesome with the potty! Yesterday Kaki came to visit and I decided to venture out for the first time. We went to the library and sat for storytime. Nicholas went potty there at the library and kept his pants dry the rest of the time, even when we went to lunch afterwards! Today was a real test as we met his friend Eli at the Burger King playground. I thought for sure there would be difficulties as he'd have to stop playing to come potty, he'd get stuck up in a tunnel when he needed to go, or he'd get mad when I'd try and make him go. But he did great! He came and told me 3 times while he was playing that he had to go!! He's a superstar!
I've also discovered that Nolan is quite picky when it comes to pacifiers. He has a certain kind of nipple that he prefers--the NUK kind, and he sure gets upset if you offer him another kind. I'm adding to my to do list to stock up on that brand as these many others that I have are worthless for him. He's also taken to a certain soft blankie as his lovie. It is so adorable! When he's awake and in the swing or the car seat, he loves to put it over his face and suck on the silky part. He literally does a little sigh of relief when you give the blankie to him. And then when he's sleeping since he is swaddled and can't use his hands to cuddle with it, I just lay it to the side of his head and he rubs the side of his face into it and nuzzles up close, again sighing with comfort. It is the cutest thing! Thankfully, this blankie is a lot nicer to look at than "Puppy" and holds up well in the wash. I'm sure it'll be sticking around for a while--we'll have to come up with a good name for it!

While I wasn't sleeping...

You may be wondering where I've been this last month. Well this certainly has been such a challenging month and unfortunately I don't feel I have handled it well. The last two posts shared some of those beginning challenges and things just got worse from there. I started having suspicions on Tuesday the 16th when the family was over for Gami's dinner, that my milk supply might be low. Nolan was having real difficulty nursing. By Thursday night I realized how seriously low my milk supply was and that poor Nolan was starving. Just when we had started to make some possible progress on the sleep training, I had to start nursing on a 2 hour schedule and pump around the clock too. Plus I had to feed him in the middle of the night again until my milk came in. It finally started to improve slightly that Sunday, however it still wasn't a great supply of milk and we struggled through all of the feedings. I typically had to give him a bottle after feeding him as he wasn't satisfied and was just so upset. The waking in the night seemed to get worse too and he was up all the time, sometimes every hour. Naps weren't happening either and I was a mess. Basically he screamed during feedings and whenever he was supposed to be sleeping!! Finally after 2 weeks of this not improving (Friday 3/26) I called the doctor and explained the problems we were having. He told me that everything that I was describing was reflux and to put him on Prevacid. Well then Nolan threw me for a loop and that evening suddenly the feedings went perfectly, it felt like my milk had finally come in and was satisfying him and he did great Friday evening and all Saturday. He then slept through the night on Saturday night (an Anniversary gift to his Mommy and Daddy!) until 5:30am! So I started thinking that maybe he didn't have reflux. Then things started getting bad again and by Tuesday we decided to try the Prevacid to see if it would help. Another change that we made this month was to give Nolan a bottle at the last feeding at 11pm in order to make sure he goes to bed with a full tummy. With both the medicine to help his reflux pain and the full bottle, he has finally started sleeping at night!! Friday morning he slept till 5:30, Saturday 6:30, and on Sunday morning he slept until 7:30 without even crying once!! What a happy Easter gift! Sunday night he woke up twice because our little Houidini got out of the swaddle. But overall he's doing so much better and after a few nights of sleep, I finally feel like I'm starting to come out of my fog as well. Maybe I'll be able to manage my life again! I have literally had to put everything on hold this month. I really felt God telling me that I need to prioritize my family first and my other responsibilities need to come second. I apologize if I have neglected friendships, thank you notes, Bible studies, email, phone calls, bridesmaid responsibilities, etc. Here's hoping things will get better and stay that way!
Things that I've missed blogging about this month:
Graham and I had a wonderful 6th anniversary! We started the day with a family breakfast at our favorite local spot--Loren's Cafe and then had a fun shopping outing at the mall. By the way, Nicholas is so cute now about weddings and getting married ever since Kristin's wedding. That morning at breakfast I told him that 6 years ago Mommy and Daddy got married. He looked at me and pointed to himself and said with great excitement "Mommy, I want Nicholas to get married too!" Now whenever he sees me dressed up wearing a dress or even just a nice outfit, he'll look at up at me and say "Mommy, are you getting married?" That night Graham and I celebrated by having a wonderful dinner at The Village Tavern and then shopping at the Christian Bookstore and Target for the boys' Easter baskets (yes we are very much parents!). Then I had a great 29th birthday (my Golden birthday--29 on the 29th). Mom and Nolan and I went shopping while Nick was at school and that was lots of fun because Mom bought me some really cute dresses and a sweater. That night the family went to dinner at Sugo's. Papa was so sweet and he treated me to a lobster dinner!!
Easter festivities were wonderful too. Nicholas really got into Easter this year. On Wednesday we colored eggs with Mimi--Nick LOVED coloring the eggs. Then Thursday, he got to go to school for a makeup snow day and they had an easter egg hunt. On Saturday we got together with our Sunday School class and had a picnic and another egg hunt. On Sunday he woke to find his and Nolan's baskets and the Easter Bunny had also left a "Happy Easter" message with little bunnies and carrots on the glass door. Church was a wonderful celebration of our Lord's Resurrection and then we went to Mimi and PopPop's for more egg hunts (both inside and outside) and a delicious Easter dinner!
If we didn't have enough on our plate, I decided to potty train Nicholas this week while on Spring Break (talk about a wild and crazy Spring Break 2010!!). I borrowed a book called "Toilet Training in Less than a Day". I studied for my final exam and stocked up on all of the supplies I needed. Monday came upon me quickly and I was so nervous that it was going to go awfully and be a disaster. We started out with a potty training doll and Nicholas first taught the doll how to potty, thus learning himself. He had three accidents in the very beginning while we were still in the process of teaching the doll, but once he got on the potty himself and had his first success, he did wonderfully! On Monday he peed 12 or more times in the potty and had 2 BMs in the potty with only one accident (while he and Daddy were outside playing). Today was day two and again he did great! I'm so proud of him and he too is so proud of himself. I wonder how we will ever leave the house though as he seems to have to go every 15 minutes! But I can't even express how wonderful it is to not change his diapers.
Sweet Nolan is all smiles and has the best laugh these days. It's so much fun to make him laugh. Oh, and I got a surprise photo shoot for his 3 month pictures. Can't wait to share those when we get them! (Hopefully I'll post Easter pictures soon too)

Honoring Gami

One year ago today, Gami passed away and was joined with Our Father in Heaven. How wonderful it is to know that she is rejoicing for eternity now and no longer suffering as she did. But man do I miss that wonderful lady! There will never be another like her and I know that I will miss her every single day until we meet again. She has missed so much already in this year. My pregnancy, Graham's book release and contract for the sequeal, Ashley's engagement, Nolan's birth, Kristin's wedding, and just watching how Nicholas has grown. I know she's seeing all of us from where she is but how I wish we could share these experiences with her. There are so many times that I'm holding Nolan or looking at him when I'm reminded of similar times with Nicholas as a baby and how Gami loved to watch him. I remember how she would stand over me as I nursed Nicholas and as he would stop nursing to look up at her, she would always joke and say "Nosy!" (and I would say back to her "You're one to talk"). She loved to be with Nick as a baby and I would pick her up for our "dates" and she would ride in the back seat with him and say "Kissy, kissy, kissy" to him, always making him laugh. I can't believe it has been a year since I saw her, talked with her, hugged her, and laughed with her. Amazingly though, when I think back on these wonderful memories of her, it is like she is still with me, like they just happened yesterday. Because she was so much a part of my life, a part of me, there are so many things throughout each day that remind me of her or a funny time with her. To honor her today, Nicholas and I made a Kahlua cake. It was my first time--hopefully it turns out alright. I haven't done much baking with Nicholas but he was a great help and dumped everything into the mixing bowl and then helped me with the mixing too. (Don't worry, I didn't let him lick the bowl and get buzzed on Kahlua and Vodka--saved that for Me! Gami sure was one cool lady!) The family is coming over tonight for dinner. We'll be together and remember the wife, mom, and grandma that we loved so much. Hopefully they'll be laughter mixed in with our tears. And as life goes on without her, we know that she is watching us and loving us as always. If I take the time to stop and listen, I might just hear a "kissy, kissy, kissy"...
I love you Gami!

Zombie Mommy

I write this blog partly to update our family and friends of all of our happenings, but another big motivation for me is to have a record of our life with the boys. I have an awful memory and I hope that in keeping up with my blog, I will be able to look back on these postings and remember the wonderful moments and the challenges that were overcome as well. With that being said, I want to update on my current challenge of life with a baby that does not sleep. I hope that one day very soon I will not even remember what it's like to be so sleep deprived and Nolan will be a great sleeper and I will look back on this time and laugh (or at least be so thankful that it is behind us). And knowing me, I won't be able to remember the details that got us there either...
Nolan will be 3 months on Wednesday. I can't believe these 3 months have gone by so quickly in one way but at the same time it seems like an eternity since I slept. He normally wakes every 2 to 3 hours at night. Our best night ever was this past Friday night when I got to sleep from midnight until 5 am! I thought that maybe he was starting to make improvements but then he turned on me and Saturday and Sunday nights were awful and he was up all night (add Day Light Savings time into that and I was a disaster on Sunday). He has also regressed on his napping and is no longer napping well at all. I have to admit that all of this sleep deprivation has turned me into somewhat of a crazy person. Yesterday I was on the verge of tears all day as he cried through each naptime and I had no idea how to make it to last night when I knew I'd be up all night again (and I was). I felt as if I've totally confused myself regarding my parenting techniques and didn't know what to do anymore when Nolan cried (which has been anytime he's supposed to be sleeping). My trusty Babywise techniques that worked so well with Nicholas have failed me with Nolan. So I solicited the help of my mommy friends and of course received lots of different advice and the confusion mounted. One friend let me borrow her book that she says works wonders--"The Baby Whisperer". So I've been reading that since Friday and am attempting to use her techniques. It's similar to Babywise in terms of the schedule/routine is the same. The main difference is that you do not let the baby "cry it out". I felt the "cry it out" method wasn't working for Nolan and all it was doing was tramatizing both he and I (plus I worry about waking Nicholas too). With The Baby Whisperer you follow the routine (Eat, Activity, Sleep) and you put them to baby swaddled but awake. When they cry, you go in and do Pick up/Put Down in an attempt to calm the baby and teach them to fall asleep on their own without the props of nursing to sleep, rocking to sleep, etc. When he cries I pick him up on my shoulder, do a shush-pat on his back until he stops crying (no rocking, etc). The moment he stops crying I put him back down and can continue to shush-pat him in the crib. When he cries again, pick him back up and continue to put him back down as soon as he stops crying. You do this for as long as it takes for him to fall asleep, standing by the crib with your hand on them until they are in a deep sleep (and the paci falls out and he does not wake up and cry). Nolan is definitely paci dependant so that is a big issue to work on. Last night was my first night attempting this. He woke at 2:45 am and I did PU/PD with him until 4 am. Then he slept until 5:45 am. I tried PU/PD a few times and then decided that he was hungry and needed to eat. Afterwards I put him back down until 7 am when I fed him again to start the days schedule. During his first nap this morning I had to do PU/PD 3 times, each about 20 minutes long. It's definitely exhausting but I am trying hard to stick with it and be consistant. I'm praying that by the end of what will probably be a very difficult week, he will be sleeping better and the time for PU/PD will be very short or none at all and he will learn to soothe himself to sleep.
To add to all that, Nicholas has had a minor stomach bug since Thursday. He is once again missing school today because he had some tummy problems yesterday and it has to be 24 hours of being well to send him to school. This is making it a little challenging to spend so much time doing PU/PD in Nolan's room. Surprisingly though, I'm much more positive today and I hope to keep up this positive attitude. My problems are so minor and I know will pass soon. In the meantime, I am REALLY looking forward to naptime today!

A few more pics...

Here are a few more pictures from the wedding and the airplane. Plus a couple of pictures of the boys. Nolan is showing off his smiles (and his diapers) and then I love this picture of the boys while we were going on a walk. Nicholas looks so big next to our little teddy bear in the stroller :)